One of my plans - yes, this level of ass-hattery does actually involve a modicum of planning - was to try some staple US IPAs that can be bought in the UK. As luck would have it, the following can all be bought in the UK from those jolly decent chaps at My Brewery Tap. And so begins an IPA trip from sea to shining sea. Via Colorado.

Because it's Saturday and I have other things to do like scream at the prats on Radio 5 Live, cook tea and generally forget where I left the laptop, I'm going to keep this brief.

5pm: Brooklyn East India Pale Ale. It stinks. In a great way. Earthy, creamy, orange peel, Willamette spice? Ballsy not blousey. Like White Shield on steroids.

6pm: Flying Dog Snake Dog IPA. I think I'm about to have a Gazza moment. Too much Crystal malt. Sappy bitterness. All rather messy.

7pm: Odell IPA. Different class to the others so far. Pineapple in a glass with a bitter bite. Went great with cheeseburger and fries.

8pm: Great Divide Titan IPA. Box-ticker. Orange body, resin nose, bready note, citric punch. Tick, tick, tick, tick. All in balance, almost better than the sum of its parts.

9pm: Sierra Nevada Torpedo. Harsh but fair. Plenty of Magnum to blow the back of your taste buds away. Trickle of Citra to salve them.

Kudos to myBrewerytap for donating these beers.

Today's Obviously Made Up Fact About IPA:

Traditional English IPAs actually contained either few hops or none at all, a style that
many modern-day English brewers have now successfully recreated. >

Feeling slightly more chipper today.

A few beers around Derby helped; highlights included Whim Black Christmas in the Flowerpot, Beowulf Finn's Hall Porter in the Old Silk Mill and Railway Porter in the Brunswick.

The pubs had highlights, too: coal fires, wood fires, huge cleavage, conversations about kitchen knives, frosty terraces, the smell of shit, the smell of fresh paint, the smell of teenage desperation.

And tonight I've been catching up on those bottles; Stuart Howe's Citric Tripel (hugely fresh, oily, herbal); Anchor Humming Ale (grapefruit-riven joy) and Sierra Nevada Tumbler (not as robust as I hoped for).

Tonight's gift: one of many reasons why AP McCoy deserved to win Sports Personality of the Year

Tonight's picture: some tiles. They may be in the Barton's Arms, Aston.

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